We never thought we’d see Chris Jericho and Shawn Michaels trading blows at the top of a ladder, or The Shield and Evolution brawling through the crowd. Yet, those dream bouts happened. They just weren’t pretty. These fantasy showdowns weren’t for the faint of heart.
With another installment of Extreme Rules drawing near, WWE.com asked nine Superstars, including Roman Reigns, Sheamus and Neville, to tell us which Legends and Hall of Famers they’d want to smash through a table and pummel with chairs.
Forget the rules and forget the mat classics, because these nine Superstars have much more diabolical matchups in mind for their dream opponents.
More Extreme Rules coverage | New subscribers: Watch WWE Network for free in April
Rusev’s national pride is well-documented, as is his hatred of all things Americana — from hot dogs to apple pie. He especially loves beating an American hero. And no hero identifies with the Stars and Stripes more than “American made” Hulk Hogan.
“He’s the perfect symbol of American propaganda,” Rusev said.
Rusev to face John Cena at Extreme Rules | Watch Rusev work out
But a pinfall or submission over Hogan wouldn’t be enough to satiate The Super Athlete. He said he dreams of pounding blood, sweat and tears from The Hulkster.
“The stipulation would be a First Blood Match because if you bleed, you’re done,” Rusev added. “I can pin you, but that doesn’t do anything. Until I can make you bleed, you’re not getting away from me.”
Stardust is a little unconventional, and he said he hopes to go to battle with a Legend known for being a bit out there: The Great Muta. As for the stipulation, he had a more traditional bout in mind.
“They called it the ‘match beyond’; we’ll call it the ‘match beyond our galaxy’ — War Games, baby!” Stardust screamed.
Watch War Games on WWE Network | Who is Muta?
He picked an eclectic group for Team Muta, with Japanese star Shinsuke Nakamura and Demolition with Mr. Fuji joining Muta and … Arn Anderson.
“Arn Anderson somehow trapped spacetime in a bottle and got younger between 1987’s War Games and 1992’s Stinger Squadron against The Dangerous Alliance, so he knows what he’s doing,” Stardust said.
The intergalactic Superstar would enlist Florida legend Eddie Graham, The Midnight Express — specifically not the Stan Lane version — and Blackjack Mulligan to his side, creating an interesting clash of styles.
Full history of WarGames | Why is Blackjack Mulligan so tough?
When it came to Muta’s signature mist, though, Stardust only wanted to see one type in this War Games reboot.
“It would be green mist,” he said, “denoting nausea, vomiting and perhaps a spell of vertigo.”
Mutual respect has led to some of the greatest matches of all time. When it comes to picking someone he’d love to tear the house down with, Roman Reigns looks no further than his closest ally, Dean Ambrose. Reigns has heard plenty of stories about his former Shield partner’s gruesome pre-WWE career, but The Big Dog isn’t intimidated about stepping inside Ambrose’s wild world for a night.
“The stipulation would be anything and everything goes because it’s Dean Ambrose,” Reigns said. “We would be fighting for the title of King of the Death Match because that’s what he claims he is.”
Reigns vs. Big Show at Extreme Rules | Ambrose to battle Luke Harper
Mystery surrounds Luke Harper, but he has made one thing clear in his career: He hurts people. For that reason, he draws a lot of comparisons to some of the wildest, most dangerous competitors in sports-entertainment history. Little surprise, then, that Harper said he wants to beat on the baddest of the bad.
“ Bruiser Brody, Terry Funk and Mankind in a 4-Way Street Fight,” he said. “There’s no stipulation needed because the last man standing wins.”
Harper vs. Ambrose at Extreme Rules | Watch Mankind in Hell in a Cell
To ensure his opponents have a hard time staying on their feet at the end of the match, Harper has a secret weapon in mind.
“Thumbtacks. Just wanting to put Terry Funk in thumbtacks makes me smile.”
Tyson Kidd & Cesaro weren’t together long before capturing their first WWE Tag Team Championship, but they quickly found chemistry together. Kidd felt so confident about his bond with Cesaro that he said he’d love to line up against a team that has been together since elementary school: Edge & Christian. Kidd isn’t intimidated by his fellow countrymen.
“We would aim to take on Edge & Christian in a Ladder Match because they were the guys who really popularized tag team matches with a ladder,” Kidd said. “It would be a hell of a test for us to go in there with them in that type of match.”
Kidd & Cesaro at Extreme Rules 2015 | Watch Edge & Christian in TLC I
Whether jumping from the TitanTron or falling off Hell in a Cell, Seth Rollins always got back up no matter the damage. It’s reminiscent of Attitude Era icon Cactus Jack, who kept fighting no matter how many times a rival knocked him down. Rollins wanted to see if he could be the one to keep him down once and for all.
“I’m going to shoot for the No. 1 hardcore legend of all time: The Cactus Jack personality of Mick Foley,” Rollins said, “in a Boiler Room Brawl.”
Rollins goes extreme against Randy Orton | Watch Cactus battle Orton, too
While stepping into a stipulation Mick Foley helped to innovate, where the competitors brawl backstage until one can make it to the ring, Rollins had his eyes on stealing a victory by stealing the closest friend of Foley’s most diabolical persona.
“Barbie, of course, the baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire — that’s Cactus’ weapon and I’d like to take it from him and use it against him.”
Bad News Barrett paid his dues in underground bareknuckle boxing matches throughout the United Kingdom, so he’s always in search of a fight. When thinking about dream bouts, though, Barrett wanted to do something new against someone he’s traded black eyes with before.
“I would like to go to town with Sheamus in a No Holds Barred Match where everything’s legal,” Barrett said. “He’s one of the toughest guys I’ve ever been in the ring with.”
Barrett vs. Daniel Bryan at Extreme Rules | ‘Kiss Me Arse’ Match
The bruisers have squared off plenty of times in their WWE career, but those matches always feature hard hits and cringe-worthy slams. With everything legal, it could only get more painful.
“The fact that he’s Irish and I’m English is an extra bit of hot sauce on there,” Barrett added. “So we like tearing each other apart, and with Sheamus, we’d make some magic happen.”
Long before Neville ever corkscrewed through the air, the 5-foot-8 Dynamite Kid showed that size didn’t matter in the squared circle because he could be beat up an opponent all the same. Naturally, Neville always admired his fellow United Kingdom export, and he’d love to test his mettle against Dynamite Kid where high-risk moves are encouraged, in a Ladder Match.
“He’s very much an influence on me,” Neville said. “I was a big fan growing up, and certainly become the professional that I am today because he’s a role model of mine and someone I’ve molded myself after. So it would be an honor to be able to step into the ring with one of my favorite wrestlers ever.”
Watch Neville on WWE Network | Check out The Dynamite Kid in action
For more than six years, Sheamus has made opponents weary of standing across from him. He’s faced everyone from Zack Ryder to Triple H, and delivered beatings so bad that they left the ring limping. He’s stepped inside the Elimination Chamber and sent opponents crashing in Tables Matches. But there’s one Superstar and one match stipulation The Celtic Warrior has yet to experience.
“My dream match would be against Edge in a TLC Match,” Sheamus said. “A), I’ve never been in a TLC Match, and B) I’ve never had the chance to wrestle Edge. So it would be a lot of fun and it’s always fun to be in there against new opponents.”
Watch Edge vs. The Undertaker in a TLC Match | Sheamus vs. Dolph Ziggler at Extreme Rules