We're back, baby, so let's get right into it.
Kicking off the show, Natalya experiences an unforgettably embarrassing and unprecedented moment in her career. During a "WWE Superstars" match, she has an in-ring bladder mishap when Naomi (Trinity) hits her in the stomach. It's very awkward. Despite the fact that this sort of thing is apparently NBD in the locker room (John Cena readily admits as much to Nikki Bella, sharing a memory of his own little accident in Saskatoon during a bout of food poisoning), the possibility of a repeat incident leaves Nattie a petrified mess in the days leading up to her SummerSlam match vs. Brie Bella. More on this in a bit.
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Cameron (Ariane) shows some rather impressive road rage while driving Naomi and Jimmy "The King of Comedy" Uso, and later continues last season’s trend of completely emasculating her boyfriend Vinny by screaming at him during a party. Thanks to some harsh truths about her anger issues from Naomi and her mom, Cameron makes amends with the poor galoot and secures a pass for this latest round of emotional turmoil. Hooray.
Meanwhile, Eva Marie's quick success has gone straight to her head along with all that red hair dye. As her latest power play, she's openly antagonizing The Bella Twins whilst parading her “Maxim” spread in front of anyone who cares to look ( don't mind if we do). Hardly the plans of an evil genius, but with Nikki on the mend from an injury and Eva's popularity legitimately spiking, the head games are more effective than anyone cares to admit. Shockingly, it's Zen queen Brie who snaps out of the lotus pose and vows scorched earth upon Eva if the needling should continue.
The big downer comes when John Cena tears his triceps and faces a six-month layoff, which causes much hand-wringing from Nikki as to what his future holds. In the end, though, it's SummerSlam, and mostly everyone goes home happy: The Bellas unite against Eva Marie; JoJo wows the world with the National Anthem; and Nattie, bolstered by Tyson Kidd's words of wisdom, has a great match and escapes unsoiled. Plus, in the final moments, Brie gets to watch her man, Daniel Bryan, win his first WWE Title (from Cena, no less) after which NOTHING ELSE HAPPENED WHATSOEVER. ( Yeah, right.)
For more on "Total Divas," visit wwedivas.com and check out E!’s totaldivas.com.