Everyone wants to join forces with their hero, whether it’s to battle the forces of evil or capture WWE gold on The Grandest Stage of Them All. WWE.com asked nine Superstars to reveal their ideal partners in crime, and then we made their wishes come true with a sample of what that fantasy squad would look like, presented by “Seventh Son,” the story of a legend and an apprentice coming together to defeat dark forces — in theaters Feb. 6. Some choices may surprise you, but each will have you wishing for a time machine.
Watch: Fantasy Warfare showdowns | Superstars get pumped before the bell
“Swarthy” is an adjective that quickly comes to mind when describing these two over-the-top characters. While Razor Ramon’s dancing skills are questionable, his assertion that, “The chicas, they for fun,” is a credo Fandango could find a lot of common ground with.
Fandango on Ramon: With him being the coolest cat of his generation, and me being the same for mine, together with our charisma, his size and my agility — and obviously both our looks — we’d be unstoppable.
Watch Razor Ramon enter the Hall of Fame | Fandango debuts at WrestleMania 29
Paige wreaks havoc on the status quo, so the perfect partner for her is someone who would never want to be called a “Diva.” Bull Nakano terrorized the Women’s Championship scene in the mid-90s, much like Paige has done to the Divas division since her April 2014 debut. Together, they’ll tear the competition to shreds.
Paige on Bull Nakano: She’s the kind of woman I look up to. She’s very “anti-Diva,” very different. She’s a bada**. She can whoop some butt in the ring. And she’s the one who I stole my finisher off, so there you go. Cheeky little fact there.
Bull Nakano dominates at Survivor Series | Photos: Paige in a leather jacket
It’s hard to imagine a more perfect — so to speak — pairing than a father and son who have wrestling in their genes. Together, the duo of Curtis Axel and his dad, “Mr. Perfect” Curt Hennig, would have a unique chemistry that no other team could match. It would also be really difficult to pull a “Barber Shop”–like breakup on a pair like that. Just think of how awkward Thanksgiving would be that year.
Axel on Mr. Perfect: You have a man named Mr. Perfect, who’s a WWE Hall of Famer, and you have his son, who’s better than perfect in the ring. That’s going to be pretty hard to beat. Now, he was in the business before me, so like any father/son relationship, automatically everything he does is right — and everything I do might be wrong. I would be more of a loose cannon. One little poke and I’d get upset. He’d probably have to calm me down. There’s a bit of old school versus new school here.
Get a close look at Mr. Perfect | Curtis Axel wins the Intercontinental Title
Andre the Giant used his unmatched size to crush the competition during his legendary career. Nearly 25 years since Andre’s retirement, Seth Rollins is carving out his own legacy, but he’s doing it with his mind. The Eighth Wonder of the World found great success with a mastermind like Bobby “The Brain” Heenan by his side, so teaming up with an “Architect” like Rollins would stack the odds even higher.
Rollins on Andre the Giant: The dude is unbeatable, right? Why would you have anybody but Andre the Giant as your tag team partner? That’s just ludicrous. He's a giant. He’s the Eighth Wonder of the World for crying out loud. You cannot beat him. I may not even have to step into the ring if he was my partner. I've seen him beat 2-3-4-5-6-7-10 guys at once. It wouldn't even be a fair fight with him and me on the same team.
50 most epic Andre the Giant photos | Rollins wins Money in the Bank
Whether it’s surviving a fall from Hell in a Cell or willfully leaping from a giant ladder, Dean Ambrose will do whatever it takes to be the last man standing. The hard-as-nails Stan Hansen made a career out of doing just that. And for a Legend who broke Bruno Sammartino’s neck and popped out Vader’s eyeball, he’s never needed to play by the rules. Only the toughest of the tough can survive in the old west, and nothing would be tougher than the outlaw team of Ambrose & Hansen.
Ambrose on Hansen: Stan Hansen would bring the power, the size, and the intimidation factor, but he’s wild enough that between me and him, things can get out of control very quickly. Matches could turn into all-out warfare, or we could use strategy and keep it in the ring. I can do a lot of the dirty work and set him up to be the big clean-up hitter.
Photos: Get a look at Hansen | Ambrose vs. Jake Roberts
Men. Real men. That’s the first thing that comes to mind when seeing two throwbacks like Lou Thesz and Cesaro team together. The second thing that comes to mind might be all the time they save by not shaving their body hair. There’s a lesson to be learned there.
Cesaro on Thesz: He personifies wrestling. He represents everything that I think it should be. He’s a class act, and he was a workhorse for the company, while at the same time being a student of the game. He was completely legit. I would have loved a chance to go one-on-one with him or to work alongside him.
Mr. McMahon interviews Thesz | Cesaro wins the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal
Could you imagine these two ranting on the mic together? Between the intensity of The Ultimate Warrior, and the gift of gab that The Miz often displays, opponents would be left shocked, and audiences entertained, before these two even ran into the ring.
Miz on Warrior: The Ultimate Warrior was my absolute favorite Superstar when I was growing up. I used to wear streamers on my arms. I would paint my face. And, of course, I would perform that epic splash of his. That would always annoy my mom!
Watch The Ultimate Warrior vs. Hulk Hogan | The Miz wins at WrestleMania 27
Putting aside a heated intra-state college-football rivalry, with Titus O’Neil starring at Florida and Ron Simmons shining at Florida State, these behemoths from the swamp would spell more than doom for any opponents whom dared to step to them in the ring. Speed and power rarely come together in such a punishing package as O’Neil and Simmons would offer. We’ve got one word to sum up this pairing, and let’s just say it’s Simmons’ favorite exclamation.
O’Neil on Simmons: He was an inspiration for me, and not just because he was the first African-American World Champion. He was funny, entertaining, and he could hold his own against the best of them. It would be an honor to work with him to see what we could do.
Ron Simmons wins the WCW World Title | O’Neil visits Nottingham
The fact that these two highly accomplished amateur wrestlers both hail from Perry, Okla., should lead the government to conduct several in-depth surveys regarding what exactly is in that drinking water. Beware: Once either of these two sets his hands on an opponent, screams of sheer terror are sure to follow. Plus, cauliflower ears never looked so good!
Swagger on Hodge: Here’s the thing: He was never taken down in college — and there’s at least five-to-six takedowns a match, and you’ll wrestle about 40 matches a season. Not one time. He was on the cover of “Sports Illustrated,” and, as far as I know, he was the only amateur wrestler ever to appear on the cover. I actually wrote a biography on him in college for class — I interviewed him and everything! He is a living legend in Oklahoma.
Sports-entertainment’s dangerous Superstars | Swagger enters the Elimination Chamber